I’m actually sitting on my sofa, holding a cube of cardboard, my cell phone tucked inside it like a swaddling baby. The man lying on the examination table has flat abs, a hairy stomach, and a big penis - none of which I possess. Butt plug in place, the nurse lowers herself onto me. “It’s just too big,” she says in a silken whisper. I look over to the corner of the room and then back to her, up and down her body as it towers over mine. She’s trying to insert a butt plug where God and sex-toy manufacturers intended. I’m lying naked in a doctor’s office and a nurse is standing over me, booty tilted toward my forehead.
